Navigating the Co-Parenting World With a Newborn

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When you have your first child and the father and yourself are not in a relationship you have to figure out how to properly co-parent. This can be a bit tricky and it is a serious learning process on top of getting into the swing of being a first time mom and dad. There are definitely some do’s and dont’s when it comes to co-parenting. Some things that were told to me before my baby girl arrived, I wish I would have taken it more seriously instead of thinking that everything would just work itself out once she got here. Being great co-parents without a lot of drama is definitely doable, but it takes both parents to be honest with themselves and what they want and expect from one another.

DO’S

One of the main things that you want to do when you are entering a co-parenting relationship is establish boundaries between you. Like if you are comfortable with the father spending the night over your house, and if so, how often. Setting a schedule for the days that each of you will have the baby. Will the baby spend every other weekend with dad or even every weekend, if you don’t have your own plans with the baby. You both should discuss the type of environment that you are and aren’t comfortable having your newborn in. I am not a smoker but my child’s father is and he knows that I do not want her in a room with cigarette smokers. We have a rule where when he smokes before he comes close to the baby he needs to take off the shirt that he smoked in and wash his hands, face and brush his teeth or put gum in his mouth. It’s also very important to keep each other updated on what is going on with the baby no matter how small it seems so that there is constant communication. Communication is the key to any type of relationship but it is especially important when co-parenting to raise your child in the best way possible.

DONT’S

You do not wan to be an ineffective communicator and not discuss what your rules, plans and expectations are for your baby. If you feel as though the father does not spend as much time as he should with the baby, don’t let it fester up inside you but have a calm conversation with him about it. Let him know that you would love to see him spend a little more time with the baby and develop a strong bond between the two of them. When you are angry with each other, never use the baby to control each other. The baby is the one that ends up suffering in the end. Do not be inflexible when it comes to how much time each of you are spending with the baby. It is important for both of you to spend as much time with the baby as possible.

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ADVICE GIVEN TO ME

So before I gave birth to my beautiful baby girl a lot of my family and friends had advice for me and what I should do to begin my co-parenting relationship with her father. The most important advice was for us to always be honest in our communication with one another about how we are feeling and what we want for our baby. We agree on a lot of things when it comes to her daily care and well-being and how we plan to raise her. There are things that we don’t quite agree on but respect that we have a difference of opinion and try to come to a middle ground that works best for the both of us. We have similar but also different ways of caring for and parenting our little girl and that works for us.

This is just the beginning of my journey with co-parenting. I know that as long as we continue to communicate effectively, are honest with ourselves and each other, respect one another, and remain flexible we can rock this co-parenting relationship and our daughter will grow and flourish into an amazing woman!

 

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What Would You Do With $10 Million?

So lately a lot of people have been talking about what they would do if given 10 million dollars. Most people just want to buy a lot of material things. Yet there are some that don’t. So when pondering this question it took me about a good 30 minutes to come up with just about everything I would do with that amount of money.

So first thing first, I would put $2 million in a trust for my daughter. I would build my dream home and get my dream car. I would invest in my jewelry business so that I could reach more people and make more money. I would start my nonprofit organizations: One would be for women and children who are victims of domestic violence, helping them get the resources they need and to stay safe, and rebuild their lives; The other would be for underprivileged boys and girls to help them with staying focused in school, getting into college, learning about credit, learning housekeeping skills, money management, and having good mentors to help them stay off the streets and incarcerated and on a productive path in life. I would put money in savings. I would also invest in a business or two. Lastly, I would start a clothing line for children.

That is what I would do with all that money. I would secure a good future for my daughter and myself. I would build a legacy for her to continue after I have passed away from this earth.

What would you do with $10 million?!

Happy 2018 Everyone!

I hope that everyone enjoyed their New Year’s Eve and were very safe. I did not do your typical New Year Resolution. No New Year, New Me or any of that. But I did vow to post on my blog weekly because I have really gotten out of the habit of posting on here daily like I used to. I hope that those of you who did make New Year’s Resolution, you follow through with them!

Handmade Jewelry

Young Beautiful Fly  is a jewelry company that I have started and I sell online, do pop up shops (parties at homes) and at fairs. I sell handmade jewelry for women that can be worn for any occasion. I specialize in wire work and beading as it is something that I just love to do. I think that it brings a nice element to jewelry whether you wear it everyday or for special occasions.

Belle Necklace Aqua

I also do custom orders. If you see a style that you like but you want it in different colors or with specific beads or charms I can tailor it to however you want it. Check out my website for all the products that I sell by clicking the name above that directs you straight to my website.

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You can also email me at youngbeautifulflyline@gmail.com. Also follow my page on Facebook @youngbeautifulflyline !

Hello!

Well guys it has clearly been a while since you have heard from me. I been a little bit busy with life, work and relationships. I am back now and I have tons of things to share with you all, some happy and exciting and some sad. But hey, that’s just how life goes I guess *shrugs shoulders*. I have learned that you have got to take the good with the bad, the ups with the downs, and the pretty with the ugly. So I will be sharing all of that and more with you.

 

xoxo Mz Hollywood

Early Morning Thoughts

How do you keep a relationship going when only one of the two people are willing to put in the work? How can one person see all the things that another person needs to work on but never seems to see what they need to work on?

I think that the major reason that relationships do not work is that one or both partners have no clue how to put the work in to make the relationship better. Both partners have to be willing and actually put in the time to work on themselves and the relationship. Time should be spent working on the aspects of the relationship that needs work. Communication is key to being able to put in the work to sustain a relationship.

Just some thoughts!

Deliciousness In Every Bite!

So I love to eat food. All types of food. I love trying new foods too! I am the type of person that will try anything, at least once. How do you know whether you would like something or not if you never try it? Well thats how I think, others may not feel the same.

When I was in my undergrad years I had a friend that could cook Samosas very well and she made them all the time. Probably because she knew how much I loved to eat them! The other day I had a craving for some but did not know where to get them so I did a google search and found restaurants that served them but that was not what I was looking for. I wanted to find a store that made them fresh so that I could go and buy as many as I would like and I didn’t have to wait to order them. So with the help of google and my cunning ability to drive and search I came across an Indian grocery store on my way home from work. I initially passed it and I just had to make a u-turn into that parking lot. I pulled in the parking lot praying “Oh God, please let them sell fresh Samosas” and to my surprise they did. I felt like a kid in a candy store. I bought 3 and then went home.

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Spicy Potatoes with Peas in a pastry. Delicious Indian food!

If you are wondering how long those 3 Samosas lasted me, let me tell you this it didn’t last long. I got home ate one and then the other and before I knew it I had eaten all 3! Me being the food lover that I am, I hoped in my car drove back to the store and bought 10 more. Thank God they were only 99 cents a piece. I just absolutely love the spicy potatoes and the peas. I swear I could eat these almost everyday. If you have never tried Samosas, I am here to tell you, they are delicious and you should try it at least once. If you are anything like me you will fall in love with them.

Wounded pirate

Walking to Listen

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There’s a pirate who lives in town here. He’s a young white guy, beard, messy dreadlocks, might live on the street. He doesn’t carry a cutlass and he doesn’t wear an eye-patch, but besides that, he’s the real deal – swashbuckling boots, oilskin jacket, tricorn hat, piercings, bracelets, bangles. And a mean frown, most of the time. Or I thought it was mean, till a few weeks ago.

He showed up at this freeform movement circle I go to every once in a while, to get out of my head. It’s in a big dance studio, and the point is to just move, to be myself beyond my mind, beyond all the thoughts shouting at me from the inside out. Don’t dance, you idiot! You’re not doing it right! Look at you! You’re pathetic! You have no idea what you’re doing, so just don’t. Just stop. Get the hell out…

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