So as you all know I was pregnant and expecting my first child, a baby girl. I officially gave birth on 4/15/18 at 8:09am via C-section. It was a very rocky road for me during labor and delivery as things did not go as planned at all. I have thoroughly been enjoying being a mother! No one could have ever prepared me for the instant love and adoration that I would have for my baby girl.
Most of you know that my due date was 4/6/18, but clearly my little girl did not get that memo that she was supposed to vacate the premises of my womb on that date or at least 4 days afterwards. I went in for an induction on 4/12/18 at 7am, one day after my 30th birthday, and boy was that an experience for me. The first method they tried I thought was going to work and it had to stay in for 12 hours, it was supposed to soften my cervix so that I could begin to dilate, and that was an epic fail because I still had not started dilating and I did not feel any contractions at all. The next thing they tried was giving me the Pitocin, which is supposed to make you dilate and start contractions quickly. My doctor wanted to start me on the Pitocin slowly, so instead of increasing the dose every 15 minutes she increased it every 2 hours. The rest of Thursday and all day Friday I was hooked up to an IV getting fluids and the Pitocin. Suffice it to say, that was also an epic fail. The max dose is 20ml and I didn’t start feeling minor contractions until I had gotten up to 16ml of the Pitocin. When I was checked to see if I had dilated any early Saturday morning, I was still 1cm. This was quite disappointing for me. So my doctor decided to take me off the IV for a few hours so that I could move around and then start the induction process over again. So this time I started out on the Pitocin at 9ml and every 15-20 minutes a nurse came to increase it 2ml. This time around I started feeling the contractions and by the time I got to 14ml, I needed pain meds to deal with the pain. My water finally broke! By Saturday evening when my doctor checked me and I was still 1cm she suggested that I get an epidural to relax my cervix in hopes that it would help me to start dilating more. She swept my membranes and that got me to 3cm dilated. So I got the epidural, which was something that I did not want at all. I wanted a natural birth with no epidural. Clearly that was not in the cards for me. So by early Sunday morning when my doctor came and checked and I was still a measly 3cm she gave me the look and said to me “Honey you’re still 3cm, we need to schedule a c-section now”. At that point I did not protest at all. My body was completely tired. The medicine that you put in the epidural did not work so they had to use anesthesia.
My baby girl was born at 8:09am. Because of my own complications it took me a while to be able to finally see my baby for the first time. They wheeled me into the NICU in front of her warmer to be able to look at her. It was love at first sight and she was so beautiful to me! Since being home with my baby it has been a learning curve. Getting to know the signs for when she is hungry, needs attention and getting the hang of breastfeeding. She is only 16 days old and she already has a big personality and our bond is strong and will only get stronger. I absolutely could not imagine being anything else but her mother. I never knew how much I would love being a mom nor how natural it would be to me. I love when she is awakes and she smiles at me when I talk and kiss her. She sometimes even kisses me back. She is my forever love! I have never experience this type of love before!
Even though things did not go as planned for my labor and delivery, I would not change anything at all. All the time, pain, and worry was all worth it. The fact that my baby girl is here, healthy and beautiful is all that I could ever ask for. I will love her with all my heart, teach her, cherish her and protect her until the day that I die.
Closer Look Into My Mind 
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